Learning Mandarin Chinese isn’t about speaking perfectly without ever making a mistake. It’s about speaking freely and confidently, even when you do make mistakes.
The real goal is to express your thoughts without constantly feeling nervous. That’s why I started learning Mandarin. I wanted to use it to have real conversations, not tiptoe around every sentence, terrified of messing up.
Don’t Chase the Wrong Goal
Mistakes are part of learning. Native English speakers make them. So do native Mandarin speakers. But they don’t panic or doubt themselves when they slip up.
Think about how you speak your first language under pressure. Maybe you freeze, speak too fast, or forget a word. It happens to everyone. That stress and anxiety, that’s not a language issue.
It’s a confidence issue.
Many learners think their goal is to speak flawlessly. But what they really need is to speak confidently.
On social media, you mostly see the final version, polished and perfect. What you don’t see are all the bloopers, the retries, the practice sessions. Even TED Talk speakers rehearse a lot. They make mistakes too.
So if you’re always watching perfect performances, it’s easy to feel like you need to sound like that all the time. But that’s not real life, and chasing that kind of perfection can mess with how you study and how you feel.
Practice vs. Performance
Here’s the biggest mix-up most learners make: confusing practice with performance.
Performance is like playing a basketball game.
Performance is a real conversation in Mandarin.
Performance happens when others are watching.
Performance is about using what you already know.
Performance is about looking good, keeping it flowing, and doing your best in the moment.
But practice is what you do alone in the gym.
Practice is focused on improvement.
Practice is for working on one thing, like tones, pronunciation, grammar, or vocabulary.
Practice is messy.
Practice is making mistakes, trying new things, and repeating until it clicks.
Practice is where you look silly on purpose, so you can get better.
The Right Balance
Let’s say you’re in a real Mandarin conversation and someone says something you don’t understand. You might not stop them, you just nod, guess from the context, and keep going. That’s performance mode.
You’re focused on keeping the conversation smooth. You don’t want to interrupt every few seconds to ask, “What does that mean?” That’s something you’d do in practice, maybe with a teacher.
In a real conversation, you try to come across as calm and capable. You use all your knowledge, grammar, vocabulary, and tones to make it work.
If you get stuck during a conversation, you can switch gears. Say something simpler. Change the topic. You keep things moving.
In practice, though, you can pause. You can stop mid-sentence, look things up, and say it over and over until it sticks. You can sound awkward, and that’s fine. Practice is your safe zone.
My favorite example of this is from rapper Harry Mack, who remembers when he was in music school, he could tell who was practicing and who was performing. If someone sounded flawless in the practice room, they were probably performing. If they were messing up and repeating stuff, they were really practicing.
That applies to language too. If you’re practicing but afraid to make mistakes, you’re probably just performing.
But you need both. Performance and practice are both important.
Performance helps you pull everything together and test it in the real world.
Practice is how you improve the pieces, so your performance gets better over time.
They feed into each other.
Practice helps your performance.
Performance shows you what to practice.
You can’t learn everything in isolation. Real conversations help you figure out what you actually need to know. Otherwise, you’ll end up learning tons of stuff you never use.
Some people memorize lots of words but never speak. That’s not efficient. You need balance.
Here are 3 tips to help you improve your Mandarin speaking.
1. Don’t Perform During Practice
A lot of people think they’re practicing, but they’re actually performing.
Even when they’re alone, they worry about sounding good. We’ve all gotten used to being watched, by teachers, classmates, social media followers. That pressure sticks with us.
But practice time is when you should try new things, mess up, and be okay with it.
If you’re too scared to make mistakes when you’re alone, you definitely won’t feel okay making them in front of others.
Imagine a basketball player who’s afraid to miss shots during practice. They’ll avoid hard shots and just take easy ones. But that means they’ll never get good at the tough ones.
Feeling awkward in practice is actually a sign you’re growing. That’s your brain rewiring, building muscle memory.
If you don’t feel uncomfortable while practicing, you’re probably not pushing yourself enough.
2. Perform First, Then Practice
The opposite also happens. Some learners study forever but never use the language in real life.
They read books, do flashcards, and take courses, but avoid conversations.
But performance is how you make things stick. It’s like lifting weights after eating a lot of protein. Without the workout, all that energy goes to waste.
So, weird as it sounds, I recommend performing first.
Start talking, even if you’re not ready. Say simple things. Order bubble tea. Ask for directions. Talk to language partners.
Start small, but start performing.
This gives you real feedback. You’ll make mistakes. You’ll realize what words you actually need. You’ll stop wasting time on vocabulary you never use. You’ll hear how native speakers really talk.
Performance makes your learning more real, and more fun.
3. Add Play
Here’s the last tip: make both practice and performance playful.
If something’s fun, you’ll want to do it more. And the more you do it, the faster you improve.
Everyone’s different. I’m an introvert. I enjoy practicing alone. But I know I still need to perform to improve.
Extroverts might love performing but struggle with solo practice. They enjoy talking, but maybe don’t reflect or review what they said.
You need both. Make them both fun and low-pressure.
Add Play into Performance
Keep it simple.
Don’t jump straight into deep conversations with native speakers if you’re a beginner. That’s like playing tennis with Roger Federer on day one, you’ll just feel overwhelmed and discouraged.
Start with easy, low-pressure situations where it’s okay to mess up. Think ordering food, asking simple questions, or saying a few lines to a friendly language partner. These “easy wins” help you build confidence and get used to using Chinese in real life without freezing up.
Low-stakes conversations give your brain space to focus on getting the message across, not panicking about every tone or word. Over time, you’ll naturally build up the ability to handle more complex conversations, just like a beginner swimmer who starts in the shallow end before diving into the deep.
Talk with other learners. Speak with patient natives.
Find people who understand the learning process. Other learners are great because they get what you’re going through. You can share struggles, laugh at mistakes, and encourage each other without fear of judgment.
Patient native speakers are also key. They’ll slow down for you, explain things, and help you feel safe enough to speak up.
You’ll improve faster when you’re not constantly worried about how you sound. Anxiety shuts down learning. Feeling relaxed opens you up to trying new words, taking risks, and actually enjoying the language.
My secret phrase.
One trick I used early on was to start conversations with this phrase, “不好意思，我的中文不太好”. This means “Sorry, my Chinese isn’t so great”.
This phrase opens up so many benefits. It lowers your expectations so you get out of your head. It makes you appear more vulnerable and endears yourself to the other person.
It makes the other person more willing to open up and help you ask you questions and continue the conversation. This phrase helped me make so many great friends.
Celebrate small wins.
Used a new word in a conversation? Understood a line in a TV show without subtitles? Said a whole sentence without translating in your head? That’s progress.
Learning a language is full of tiny breakthroughs, and if you don’t stop to notice them, it can feel like you’re going nowhere. But when you celebrate those wins, no matter how small, you stay motivated. You build momentum. And you start to realize that fluency isn’t one big leap. It’s thousands of little steps.
Add Play into Practice
Keep it interesting.
Practice doesn’t have to mean sitting alone doing drills or repeating the same sentence ten times. Sure, that has its place, but it’s not the only way.
Mix it up. Practice with friends. Record voice notes. Join a study group. Play language games. Make it fun. When you actually enjoy what you’re doing, you’ll stick with it longer, and your brain will absorb more.
Motivation isn’t just about discipline, it’s about designing practice sessions that don’t feel like a chore.
Use materials that interest you.
There’s no rule that says you have to learn from textbooks. If you’re into cooking, use Chinese recipes and food videos. If you like sci-fi, find a Chinese sci-fi podcast. If you love music, translate your favorite Mandarin songs. The more personal and relevant it is, the more engaged your brain will be.
Boring input leads to shallow learning. Interesting input sticks.
Talk about things that matter to you.
Don’t just learn textbook phrases that have nothing to do with your life. Talk about your life. Your opinions. Your dreams. The stuff you actually care about.
When you practice saying things that reflect you, the language becomes more meaningful, and way easier to remember. You’re not just learning Chinese. You’re learning how to express yourself in Chinese. And that’s what builds real fluency.
I hope this helps you improve your Mandarin speaking skills.
加油,
Danyo
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